Good question!While I fully concur with the backup camera your other items are unneccessary fluff. Fancy wheels - for a kid to wreck, nope.
AWD (while maybe useful) I say is not necessary. Many decades ago I grew up in snowy Maine and the then current FWD Subies (with old bias tires) were all the rage. Many years later I took my 98 FWD CRV to Maine (Dec 03?) where over the course of a few days 43" of white stuff was dumped on it. Once the trail was broke it simply ate it up - all while using regular (way down south) passenger tires.
Q: why not put her in the 09 CRV and get another one for yourselves?
If your teenage daughter having alloys and a back up cam and AWD is a must then get her a 2016 SE (same as a lx but with window tint and alloys) or a EX. If not then give her the 09 and get yourself something new or used/ Certified Pre Owned.
My 2016 SE is FWD.